She

She sat alone a drink in her hand thinking about all her failed relationships

She took a long sip leaning back in her seat

Laughter bubbled inside of her as She thought of one of her lovers

Good in bed, but couldn’t keep a job; damn She was missing his good lovin

Not his dead beat ass

Another memory floated through her mind of a man so beautiful but his soul

Was pure black; use to beat her for the sheer delight of hearing her beg and scream

She thanked god for letting her escape with her life intact still the scars remain

And the screams She still hears in her head, but She survived

Music played low in the background smoke filled the lounge and She added her own

Cigarette smoke to the mix

Waiter walked by She halted his steps ordering another Jack Daniels on the rocks

To many nights spent alone, to many sad songs played over in her mind

Why was She sitting here adding and subtracting mistakes and consequences?

One tear slid down her over made-up cheek to be chased by another and another

The song became louder inside her mind a song She heard too often

Rhythm of the sound surrounded her, the beat thumping making her temples

Pulse in and out

She tried to put the glass to her lips her hand shook with its attempt to connect

Liquor splashed over the rim running down her finger tips

She licked the drops mixed in with her now flowing tears

The looks and stares She received did nothing to combat the war that was going on

Inside her as She reflected all her failed relationships

Some She truly loved, there were a few just for sex, a couple for their outward

Beauty, they lacked beauty on the inside, one or two She could have married

Now the wrinkles were a threat to her beauty

Her body has lost that voluptuousness that drove men wild

She was tired and defeated in her own self pity

Letting life beat her as that man did touched her soul and robbed

Her of loving herself more than She could love any man

Cigarette burned to the end She reached down and put it

Out, took the last swig of her drink

She stood on wobbling legs and staggered to the door

Reached for the handle to let herself out

A hand reached from behind her stopping her before She

Could leave She turned to look at who prevented

 Her from disappearing into the night