Who is this I Speak Of

Who is this that I speak of
a lover
a friend
a stranger or the person with in
A glass of vintage champagne
ageless as the earth
strong as the universe is vast
wisdom personified
grace and beauty
your soul define
in your arms I am born
life you've given
sustain me
who is this I speak of
a lover
a friend
a stranger or the person with in
Mirror, mirror on the wall
will you reveal what's in my heart
No, for its my secret to keep
my revelation which you seek
is not for all
to the one that's special
to whom you call
in the middle of the night
to chase away your nightmares
this is who your secrets are for
who is the this I speak of
a lover
a friend
a stranger or the person with in

Music Soul

I use to hear you sing to me at night
chasing away the nightmares
Your lyrics reflected the struggle
in my mind
you sing as if you understood
my hidden fears
It told the story of a soul
that has no color
Repressed spirit that has lost its way
unrecognizable desires I don't know
exist
I cry out to you needing
to hear your song
Your music chased away
the bad dreams
that left my heart beating
to the rhythm of
my screams
I don't hear the music
anymore you no
longer sing to me
My nightmares return
I need your song
Sing to me again
Music Soul

Peace

I can't seem to find peace 

no matter where I turn
Its elusive, avoiding me

It runs and hides like the sun 

being chased by black clouds

Every time I get close enough to find it

It slips away so quietly

Leaving me searching for it

in the darkest corners of my mind

Peace, where are you, why won't you

hold me in your arms

sing to me in your sweet comforting voice

I need to feel you close to me

my sanity is slipping away ever so quickly

If you are out there, please let me know

Give my a reason not to slit my throat

The grave is calling me it says peace is here

I fear my peace may lie there

Touch the Sky

Tears

To many hearts broken

Every day a son lost

As my hope weakens

Retribution? at what cost

Sins of a father

Tear a family apart

Each wishing for a new tomorrow

Against the odds

Rising from ashes the Phoenix

Salvation is here no more

                Tears

My thoughts

my pain

My feeling

my joy

My revelation

my retribution

My sorrow

my tears

My expression

my fears

My love

my heart

My soul

my spirit

My love

my disappointment

My salvation

my grave

Life's a Bitch

Life’s a bit**

gets its kicks off

your problems

delivering a ransom to

priceless for payment

Destroying any self respect

you fought so hard to get

in the end all you

have is the life

you’re left with

Feelings

I have no more tears to cry

no more fears to stir me

There is no love in me

my love a dry well

Blown away ashes of my hope

floating through the air after

a firestorm

Dreams unreachable, unattainable

entice me only when I sleep

Sorrow entwines its hurtful grip

around my heart

Squeezing, inflicting excruciating pain

I fall to my knees

praying to a power stronger than myself

asking for deliverance from some

unseen thing

Pulling at me drawing me closer

watching from with inside me

She Whispers

She Whispers

Promise Me

Promise Me

Soaring Above the Heavens

Soaring Above the Heavens

Say My Goodbyes

Say My Goodbyes

Music Soul

Music Soul

Love You Just a Little Bit More

Love You Just a Little Bit More

Pleasure

Pleasure

Pain, Sorrow, Tears

Take your pain

wrap it up
In sorrow

kiss it with tears

Reflection :)Poem from Illusion

Look into the windows of my soul
Reflected is the sorrow untold
Mirrored images cracked
jagged edges exposed
Distorted illusion
razor sharp protrusion
cuts weep, blood slowly leaks
vision clouded reflection of a
soul
without hope

Raw

Erosion of emotions

Cancerous sore, arsenic poison

My hatred boils

Peel away the scab, an old scare reveal

Deep beneath surface are many more

Lesions exist to serve a reminder

Of the pain I've gone through

Slowly eating away my insides

Eruptions coming

Spewing out injustice, toxic frustration

Squeezing breath from my burning lungs

Leaving me exposed 

Raw

Wounded Soul :)Poem from Illusion

Forgiveness is the wind

blowing away darkened clouds
Behind lies the sun

rising to smile... revealing a sky
Blue as a ribbon 

tied around a heart 

that's beating
Out a rhythm to a 

soundless soul

Cry

Go a head bare your soul

You don't have to be strong for the world

Give in to the emotions you have so valiantly

Fought off

Give in to the pain, that has no name

Tired? I know you are

Tired of trying to shoulder responsibility alone

Carrying around the guilt if you let everyone down

Fair? no it's not

You're the one who is up all night

Release that hurt

Don't be afraid

Cleansing your spirit is always ok

Go a head, the gods are listening

Sorrow, is something we all have inside of us

This is your healing, purge those feelings and

Cry

Kiss Goodnight :)Poem from Illusion

Heal me, put me back together,

 Broken and drowning in my own tears
Lift me up higher to grasp the clouds
Give me the wings of angels so that I
May soar above the heavens
Reconcile my heart to the pain
Give me rebirth of a new spirit
Heal me, make me whole, and kiss me
Goodnight

Crystal Ball

I gaze into a crystal ball to see my future
The ball was blank, is that what my future looks like
I couldn't accept it, so I glimpse at it again, still the same result
In true frustration, this was my last hope I picked up the crystal ball
And throw it hitting a wall shattering in millions of pieces
Symbolic of my life, a million directions, none of them leading anywhere
One piece landed at my feet
I went to pick it up and stop, staring back at me was
My mother's face, sadness in her eyes
One tear trapped on her eyelash
I picked up the piece of shattered glass
Looking closely at her face and then I realize
I was starring at myself

Rose

A rose striving to bloom
In a garden
Full of thorns and thistles
Chocking off its life
It hangs it head
While watching each of its petals fall
The sun can no longer break through
The gray mist that hovers above
The air is pungent from the carcasses
That lay near
A rose of beauty so delicate
Smells of sweetness
It's all in vain
No one will ever see its loveliness
Breathe in its fragrance
No one will behold its grace
No one will miss it; it's just another
Flower gone
Swallowed up in a bed of evil
To weak to fight for the right to belong
It hangs its head in defeat
As the last petal falls

Arsenic Love

He use to love me
Call me his queen
His love became dark, grotesque
I became afraid
Nothing was good enough
Not even how I said his name
In my state of mind I was benumb
I couldn't even feel shame
For what I'd become
Seeing myself through his eyes
It reflected all the lies
He loved me no one else would
To him I was a prisoner held
Captive in his heart
His love was corruptible, corrosive
Contaminating me
Time has no age
Age has time
My heart beat the rhythm of a ghost
It beats the rhythm of the damned
This was his love for me
He took my will
Replaced it with fear
Smothered my self esteem
Killed my self worth
He couldn't touch my soul

Suppress my spirit

Manipulate :)Poem from Illusion

Strings pulled, dancing to a tune
 

Mouth speaks, not my words
 

Thoughts formed, not conveyed
 

Feelings ignored, they don't exist
 

Empty, mindless, vacant stare, soulless eyes
 

Hollow shell

Days Gone By

Looking back, I can visualize so clearly the good times we use to have
Barbeques that went on for days
Laughter almost drowning out the songs we played on the old stereo
Pop's dancing, doing his thang
Momma cookin and cussing out pour Uncle George
In the end family sitting around the dinner table, telling tall tales
Pop's gotta little drunk, had to go lie down
The children running around playing hide and go seek
Their stomachs full of the great meal Momma fixed
What I remember most is all the love that could be felt
From Great Aunt Flo to the innocent baby softly snoring in his crib
To bad those days are gone
Memories never forgotten
Memories passed on
Generation to generation
Days gone by

Empty

A soul broken

A song with no lyrics

A spirit sick

A book with no words

A mind lost

An expressionless thought

A heart damaged

A room with no doors

A body abused

A cage locked

A future with no hope

Empty

I'm Only Human

I'm only human, I can only do so much
I can reach down in the deepest part of me
Feeling around for answers
Hoping to connect with myself
Retrieving the best of me
Not everyone is satisfied with my results
I'm only human, I try to accomplish my goals
Often I'm stopped by the stumbling blocks
In my path
Then I realize those stumbling blocks are me
Here I go again in search of an answer
I know I can go a little deeper
Scrapping the bottom of my soul
I can't go any further, so I've been told
Pick up the pieces of my life
Once shattered, glue them together
I'm only human my life does matter